When we enter this world we are all born with a clear and fearless mind. We have not had experiences that would cause us to be afraid. It is not until we become old enough to develop conclusions about things that fear begins to set in. Have you ever wondered why?

The answer is in the word. F.E.A.R., which is nothing but Fictional Experiences that Affect our Reasoning. Let’s look at each word and how you can overcome fear.

Fictional

Most of the thoughts that make us afraid come from our ideas of what might happen in a given situation. Most of the time our thoughts are far worse than the reality at hand. Before you are quick to lend yourself to your fears ask yourself a few questions.

  • Could it really happen?
  • What are the chances of it happening?
  • What is the worst possible outcome?
  • How will I respond if it does happen?

Experiences

We are often guilty of taking the experiences of others and making them our own. One of the most popular examples of this is the fear of becoming an entrepreneur. People often have a fear of starting their own business venture because of a few individuals who have tried it and failed. We all have to take our own journey in life and with each journey comes its own experiences.

The best way to prevent the fear of following in someone else’s footsteps is to learn from their experience instead of focusing on it. What do I mean? Don’t pay attention to what happened or their negative response to what happened, instead look for why it happened and ways you can avoid making the same mistakes. This will help you take the necessary steps to have a more favorable outcome.

Affect

The affect things can have on you is always a foundation for fear. Look at relationships, when you have a few bad ones it causes you to be more guarded and slower to let anyone get close to you. Fear of a bad feeling or experience happening to you again is one of the biggest struggles when it comes to fear.

How do you overcome this? The answer is quite simple, you look at what happen and recognize the part you played so that the next time you are wiser and know how to respond (if there is a next time).

Reasoning

This word carries several meanings but in this case, I am referring to your thought process. When you first notice fear starting to take over your life or decision-making, it is important to stop and reason through the things mentioned above. You will find that if you really take the time to do this there is not much left to feed your fears and you can then move forward.

Don’t let Fictional Experiences Affect your Reasoning (F.E.A.R.) and rule over your life!

All the best, 

Dr. Antwala

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